Durmerrick Ross stands beneath lights at an event.
Getting into Howard University was a dream come true for Durmerrick Ross. It was fall 2016 and the nation was alive with activism in the wake of Donald J. Trump’s election and upcoming inauguration.
Ross jumped into life at Howard with aplomb. He became Mr. Freshman, part of Howard’s Royal Court that promotes campus leadership, representing the best of the best. He dedicated himself to protesting any perceived involvement by Howard with President Trump’s agenda or cabinet, creating the unaffiliated student group HUResist in the hopes of pushing Howard toward resistance against Trump’s more conservative educational doctrine. His freshman year wasn’t just a time of political activism — it was a time of personal growth.
“I was coming into my own identity as a queer person, I was around people who were more accepting,” said Ross.
He came out on the social media platform formerly known as Twitter in December 2016, something that his mother and church rejected at that time. But his pain was softened by knowing he would return from winter break to Howard, where he “had built a community."
While he had experienced depression before, coming out as gay produced new waves of anxiety and feelings of worthlessness. In the spring semester, he sought help from Howard’s counseling services, but without an immediately available spot, he was placed on a waitlist.
It all came to a head on April 23, 2017, the night of Howard’s Student Choice Awards, where Ross won Activist of the Year. That night, after celebrating with friends and drinks, the joy turned bitter. Eventually, Ross began vocalizing his desire to end his life. His friends grew increasingly concerned about Ross and decided to call campus police to get help.
